~~~
flowery displays
retreat from masculine lips;
threat of the bee sting
~~~
flowery displays
stand erect and dress proudly;
beckon the bee kiss
~~~
flowers by nature
understand true liberty;
resting in glory
~~~
by Brad Frederiksen
for
I have been visiting all of the contributors to the One Single Impression Prompt – Rest, and it struck me just how difficult it is for me find words of compliment and appreciation despite my genuine respect. Thanks to my exorcism last night, I was able to ignore that terrible “I”, and I have put together this Haiku chain in appreciation.
Please consider this a comment on each of your contributions, and if you have an image that you would like to attach it to, please feel free to do so. A link back to Maekitso’s Cafe would be greatly appreciated.
12 responses so far ↓
SandyCarlson // July 21, 2008 at 9:23 pm |
That is very, very beautiful. I can’t think of a better way to comment! Thank you.
tumblewords // July 22, 2008 at 4:37 am |
Very nice!
Patricia (a/k/a Roswila) // July 22, 2008 at 6:59 am |
It’s always wonderful to share in a writer’s stretching and growing. And, oh, that pesky “I” … that’s a big struggle of mine in writing any of the eastern forms (and even sometimes in free verse). Have you read any of the new US poet Laureate Kay Ryan’s work? I’ve got to get a collection of her work. Just the few I’ve read in articles blow my mind with their, as William Carlos Williams said, “No poetry but in things.” I suppose one *could* understand “I” as a thing, though … LOL!
Pam // July 22, 2008 at 9:58 am |
The last one reminded me of the passage about the lilies of the field. So wonderful to rest in glory.
Raven // July 22, 2008 at 10:19 am |
I especially like the last one with it’s “resting in glory.”
Brad // July 22, 2008 at 7:06 pm |
Hi Patricia. I am really enjoying sharing the process of learning in this environment. The encouragement that my vistors have been offering is amazingly liberating. Thanks for pointing me to Kay Ryan’s work. I have sampled a bit today and I am hooked. I can especially relate to her initial feelings of repugnance from the idea of “public exposure and public investigation of the heart”. I wonder if the writer can ever view the “I” as just another thing. That, little i suspects, would be quite the revelation.
Dana // July 22, 2008 at 11:05 pm |
I love the lines: “flowery displays / stand erect and dress proudly.” Very nice. But listen, what is this One Single Impression you speak of? Never heard of it. Do tell.
Brad // July 23, 2008 at 12:26 am |
Hi Dana.
The One Single Impression community have been a fantastic source of inspiration for me, and incredibly supportive and friendly. Head on over and enjoy.
I am looking forward to exploring your collaborative work. Hope to see you back soon. Thanks.
Pen Me A Poem // July 23, 2008 at 3:05 am |
I especially like the third one too. Very beautiful. I would be delighted if you would compose a Haiku for my weekly poetry prompt I hold. :)
Beaman
jillypoet // July 23, 2008 at 4:27 am |
There’s just something about bees, kissing & stinging. I really like your haiku.
Sandy // July 25, 2008 at 5:26 am |
Very nice. The third is my favorite.
Lisa at Greenbow // July 26, 2008 at 6:14 am |
it is funny that you mentioned a bee kiss. I have often thought about bees kissing flowers. They do seem to like to be like Eskimos and snuggle up to the prettiest flowers.